You may be a robotNazi if.................. Jeff Oxworthy

[Davis Myarker]

You may be a booster supremacist if
1. you believe all pips / anti should be banned but always pretend to admire them
2. you believe just using spoosted inverted rubber both sides defines you as a superior athlete
3. you are constantly backstabbing by complaining to ITTF about pips / anti player especially treated pips
4. you believe Rule 2.4.7 just exists not for you but to just for ITTF to hoodwink the IOC
5. you get slaughtered by pips / anti players in leagues & tournaments but avoid them at club practice & wonder why you lost
6. you lay awake at night wondering what next rule or regulation change you can "instruct" ITTF to make to limit choppers
7. you enjoy convincing pips / anti players that ITTF loves diversity & that is the REAL reason why they are not banned
8. you believe you should get bonus rating points just because you have the most graceful & sexy playing style
9. you believe an old player who never looped should still only use inverted rubber
10. spoosting & spin gluing are just a performance issue and not a health issue
11. you want pips / anti players to believe everyone uses ONLY so called ITTF “approved” spoosters & spin glues (whereas fact remains that Rule 2.4.7 says entirely something else)
12. you think it is the duty of every pips / anti player to train you hard using their pips / anti side just before a tournament match but you will go out of your way to avoid them at club sessions.
13. constantly email ITTF that pips treating is a pandemic to mask the fact that rule 2.4.7 violations are the real pandemic
14. you want everyone to believe that random testing using thickness meter proves there is 100% chemical testing AT ALL LEVELS in table tennis
15. you love how ITTF has fooled IOC for 30 years into thinking there are no health issues in table tennis because you spot check a few rackets at 5 star tournaments
16. you delude yourself you do not have a strong side (usually forehand) & weakside but you are like most pros with equal forehand & backhand
17. you use spoosted inverted rubber on your weakside to be social
18. believe that if ANY pips /anti players beats you , it is ONE & ONLY because of their using anti /pips & not because they have any REAL table tennis skills
19. when someone asks about who won a match you played you always absolutely make sure you make it clear quickly that your opponent used pips / anti if you lost a match
20. you refer to spinny inverted rubbers as "normal rubbers" & those who use them as " 'normal' players"
21. you refer to anti / pips users as junk players or funny rubber users
22. you are convinced that spin glues & spoosters don't kill people but treated pips do
23. you believe that most spectators will (like you) prefer third ball attack matches between two loopers rather than a match with longer rallies between a looper & chopper
More to come

"Jeff Oxworthy"

[Bubba LeRoy]